The Ugliest Woman In The World Review
Oh my. When I learned that Evil Aliens director Jake West had a hand in new cult DVD label Nucleus Films I fully expected something unusual. Of their initial releases psycho-sexual thriller Between Your Legs plays it fairly straight but Spanish genre mash-up The Ugliest Woman In The World ups the oddity factor considerably.
With an early nod to Terry Gilliam’s Brazil – plastic surgery obsessed woman in the near future, it’s not a stretch - The Ugliest Woman is the story of beauty obsession gone horribly wrong. The story opens New Year’s Eve, 2010. Police lieutenant Arribas is spending yet another evening at home alone. A party is winding down at a local old folk’s home. One elderly resident excuses herself at the stroke of midnight and followed to her room by a mysterious nun. A mysterious knife wielding nun, in fact, and soon the walls run red with the old woman’s blood. Arribas and his squad of men are called in to investigate.
The perpetrator: the titular Ugliest Woman in the world, Lola Otero. So ugly she set nurses screaming in terror at her birth. So ugly she was abandoned by her parents and sent to live in an orphanage. So ugly that her only childhood friend was a kind hearted - and completely blind – nun. So ugly that the male orphans covered her head with a bag before raping her. So ugly that her true love vomited with great force and fled upon seeing her face. And yet, strangely, remarkably not ugly when we meet her. Thanks to the experimental muta-genetics of the discredited Dr. Werner, Lola can be made beautiful through the regular injection of Werner’s wonder drugs and has now set off on a mission to destroy the beautiful people who stole her love from her. Can Arribas find and capture her before she wreaks havoc on the upcoming Miss Spain pageant?
Directed by Miguel Bardem, more recently of Incautos fame, Ugliest Woman is a tight, slick, goofy piece of work. It may not be a classic but it is hugely entertaining from start to finish, littered with sight gags and off kilter characters as it successfully rams together Blade Runner style sci-fi noir with horror and sex comedy slapstick. Talk To Her’s Roberto Alvarez is fantastic as the weary Arribas, lending just the right amount of soul to sell the part, while Javivi’s part as Arribas’ sidekick Pelayo nails the comic relief. Those thinking this would be little more than a T&A fest will be either relieved or disturbed (depending on your perspective) to learn that there is only one pair of breasts – also remarkably not-ugly – to be found but temper your disappointment with joy at the fact that such a breath-takingly goofy film even exists.
The Nucleus DVD releases is coded Region 0 – clever monkeys – PAL and features a perfectly serviceable anamorphic transfer, flawless English subtitles, and a Making Of Featurette. Not quite as manic a genre mash up as Save the Green Planet, The Ugliest Woman in the World is nevertheless one of the more successful genre-blenders I have ever come across. Kudos to Nucleus for having the stones to put it out and giving it a solid release.
